Want Two Dinners for your faces?

This was my life the threesome that became a dysfunctional foursome--me the oldest sister faced with demands from 'mother, father' sister' who I did lie for and make nice when things on the surface had to look nice and well-manicured. Appearance was important, attitude was everything and even if it was not an attitude I saw much point in sharing, I had better. The intimidation came from not being accepted as 'smart enough' by dad and now his friends. The surgeon generals warning should also include that 'children of surgeons are expected to become surgeons who would never smoke, drink, play a dangerous sport, or lead a hedonistic lifestyle'. Yeah right ! Would they listen, do we now ?

Anyway, the stuck-up rich people that lured my father into materialistic appreciations for the finer things, after proving over and over he was a skilled physician, took getting in with the social crowd, more lucrative for him. Who he was at home was much different than who he was in the operating room. A good separation but a separation of personalities, each requiring a different set of rules just to make a 'happy medium' even possible. The more he knew and the right people he shared it with was the key.I did not have him to converse with as real father-daughter he was too busy learning and getting really good at becoming chief of staff soon.

I didn't have the time to sit around and wait for him to come around. I veered away from medicine all together for about six years. I engaged in cheap labor jobs not only because I wanted to show him I could work anywhere but because I really liked the atmosphere that taught me weekly security and never to over-extend myself. I learned to budget. I found leaving the foursome temporarily was a challenge I had to just do. When I heard this song while packing an overnight, Steve Perry gave me a reason, a little ooomph to see it through. Dad was disappointed in my choice to place hospitality management in the foreground while placing medicine, any field, on the back burner for now. I would of served him his two dinners right there because only hours ago in front of friends and colleagues, he was thrilled I was even getting a job.

Sometimes fathers just want what is best for their daughters even if it means them trying to live vicariously through their children when something fails in their career. There was not a huge argument but there certainly was much silence in the back screened-in porch where we all sat dim-witted. Today, I give him credit for being persistent and I thank him for letting me grow into eclecticism. It has shaped me for the better person I am and music, many kinds, can never be forgotten when there is a learning memory attached to it . . .