Before we said "I Do" it was 'the little things'

He had been buying french fries all night just too talk to me. To look at me. He seemed mesmerized by what i was not sure, but mesmerized just the same. I was the assistant manager of the snack bar at a local bowling alley/arcade/indoor playroom for kids, teens and adults. We were not that busy and I didn't mind the company nor the constant admiration. This went on for about a month till he got up enough nerve to ask me out. Our first 'date' was actually sitting on the hoods of our cars in the parking lot after everyone's shift was done and listening to tunes.

Being eclectic I never listened to just one kind of music, but rather expressed my affection for all kinds, including country. Tanya was a favorite because her and I went way back with hits like Delta Dawn and What's Your Mamas Name, so when this song came on the radio I expressed my devotion to hearing it. The guy who already decided I was going to be his wife in a matter of a year and few months was determined to find out everything there was to know about me. The 'little things' he ventured to discover, kept him intrigued.

I reminded him that knowing the little things I liked and actually doing those or providing those was totally different. I don't judge books by their cover nor people, I learn about them each page at a time. This guys 'book' was filled with intolerance, pain, suffering, heartache, etc and I was 'his shining little light'. Only four years my senior, I exceeded him and surprised him with remembering the little things about him he liked without ever divulging what it was that made him feel good. A ride on a bicycle made for two, sugar cones not wafer, the right side of a bed never the left . . .

I believed then and still do today, that it is the little things about someone when remembered by someone they love and appreciate, builds the esteem in the relationship. Those little things are far from extravagant and are not acknowledgedin price or cost;rather those little things when done without asking but never taken for granted, aremore valuable than gold or platinum on the left fourth finger of the left arm !

Unfortunately in some fairy-tale beginnings, the end after saying "I do" can mean those little things once remembered and sworn to never take advantage of can completely disappear in a relationship when self-centeredness and envy become more noticeable things to undertake.