Betrayed...

"I want Pat Benner!!"  I screamed.  "I want Pat Benner!" 

"That is Pat Benatar, honey.  Its just a different song."  My mother tried to reassure me.

"Nooooooooooooooo!  I want Pat Benner!"

For some reason, of all the songs in the world...this is the song that my 3 year old brain snatched up, grabbed ahold of , and pretty much killed for the rest of my family at no fault of my own.  I listen to it now, and I don't quite get it.  Yes, Pat Benatar was sheik, rocker-girl, coolness, a symbol of the eighties, an amazing vocalist, etc., etc.... But of all the songs in the world, to know that my parents still make fun of the obsession that I had at such an early age with that song is bewildering to me.  Shadows of the Night?  My Grandparents owned a resteraunt/bar, and whenever we would go there, if I was a good girl, I was given a dollar to play in the jukebox. All four credits entertained the lunch crowd with a back to back to back to back "Shadows of the Night" serenade.  I had one of those little record players that folded up into a suitcase.  That thing was my best friend.  I carried it everywhere and listened to the same 4 records that I had over and over.  That was, until I got the "Shadows of the Night" single.  Then, I forgot about the others.  I actually think I forgot there was a B-side to that '45, because I can't tell you now what that song was. 

But what I remember most was the video, and how I would watch MTV all night waiting for that video to come on...I remember this one night the VJ saying over and over..."Coming up, Pat Benatar."  So I waited to watch my favorite girl, sing my favorite song, like I did everynight for the last few months... "And here's Pat Benatar with, 'Get Nervous'??"  What?  The video came on and so did my tempor tantrum.  "I want Pat Benner!!  MOMMY!  NOOO!"  I screamed for an hour.  Heartbroken.  I couldn't possibly understand that she sang more than one song, and I didn't care to.  I only wanted "Shadows of the Night" forever, and nothing else. 

Eventually, of course, I got over it.  But every once in a while, like shadows in the night, the memory of betrayal by the MTV VJ creeps up into my brain and I am reminded once again that you can't always get what you want.  I think that subcounsiously this has left a lasting effect on me through the rest of my years.  Because, you see, now, when I don't get what I want... I "Get Nervous".